Monday, October 19, 2009

Concerning Fear and Risk

"Whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it." (Matthew 16:25)

About a month ago I joined a Spark at Biola University. Sparks are clusters of friends who challenge eachother to take proactive and healthy risks. They meet once a week for a month, and committ to a different risk each week. This week we took our first set of risks together. My risk was reciting original poetry at an open mic night.

So how does this tie into Matthew 16:25?

At the age of nine, I began to write poetry. It was more than a hobby of mine, in fact, it quickly became a passion. However, alongside of that passion, insecurity developed. Is my poetry any good? Will it ever have a purpose beyond my own self delight? Is'nt poetry a dead art?

About a year ago, I realized that God desired to use my poems to encourage people and bring specific issues to surface. (Matters that have been continously dear to me are divorce, dating as Christians, true identity found through Christ, and fasting) Having met this revelation, I also met even more fear and insecurity then before. I'm sure those of you who have passions, can relate. ;)

Knowing that God had stirred a passion in me that was designed to be used up for a purpose, I still basked in my own insecurities and refused to budge.

Until October 15. For the first time ever, I recited my poetry for an audience and the response was incredible* Beyond that, I was able to offer the passion that was so freely given to me back up to God.

I share this experience to remind you of this; We are not designed to lock up our passions in the face of fear or discomfort. We are called to offer back up to Him what was so freely given to us, all that which falls under the category of life.

This week I am going to begin calling my best friend from high school regularly and sharing God's love with her through encouragement, and His word. I am posting this risk for pure accountability because I am quite nervous just thinking about the first phone call. Don't worry, I'll keep you posted!

For more inspiration concerning risk and Sparks, check out Jasson Jaggard's blog ( Jaggard is a Professor at Peperdine University who originally launched Sparks on the Pepperdine campus. This project has spread throughout the L.A. area, but can be started anywhere around the world. For information on starting your own Spark, simply contact Jason Jaggard through e-mail!


1 comment:

  1. Poetry, yet. And what happened when you dared to put the power of language and your soul to the spoken word? Massive response. So the lesson to be learned is precisely what you grasped. And I hope you keep at it, Alyssa. And keep blogging.